Sunday, August 2, 2015

Human is a social creature

“Man is by nature a social animal; an individual who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either beneath our notice or more than human. Society is something that precedes the individual. Anyone who either cannot lead the common life or is so self-sufficient as not to need to, and therefore does not partake of society, is either a beast or a god. ”

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

Aristotle

Two quotes from the learned Aristotle (384-322 BC).

I started to appreciate them only when I attended 40's. Notwithstanding, it is not too late as I get enlightened before kicking the coffin, neither too soon nor too much. It is just enough to carry on my remaining social life.

Everything we do revolves around human in a social manner. Be it in ancient time (by group prayer) or now (by social media), despite the fact that we cannot bring to the future anything, but ourselves, as single soul or individual. You cannot bring with you to heaven or hell your best friend, your spouse or even your enemy (how nice if we could bring our enemies to hell - I'm sure many won't mind joining them).

Yet, we want others to be with us agreeing with what we say, if possible, in politics, in religion, in school or in party tonight to karaoke.

So, it best describes Aristotle's 'Social Animal... Does not... Is either beast or GOD'. Which simply put is: if you do not live with your social grouping, you are 'either animal or GOD'.

For, I personally think that Animals in fact, live in their own Animal Society - in herds or packs. Like Deer and Wolf, they organize in social groupings. For orangutan too, there is an alpha male who takes charge, and has the dominance to mate. All for better survival. Human too, in social interactions.

For, I personally think that GOD is in fact, one and many. So, there is probably a little complicated social system among it (them). This, I do not want to over state my opinion.

Anyway, the reason I want to write this article is the observation I had during a recent meeting.

People conjugate from different parts of the country. There are teams by brands, and business units, and geographical regions. Furthermore, there are hierarchy of position in their respective jobs, interlinking in a convoluted spiderweb of people with various characters and age.

Shortly, you will see some behaviours which are naturally intimidating, or artificially annoying in the making of 'biggest noise, or largest attention seeking' in the conjugation. Then, you will see and hear the 'agree with me' 'I'm right, you're wrong' types of leadership statements. Even at times, not eating the same food is considered 'unwise' or 'not cool stuff'.

You start seeing grouping being formed, alliances and best spotlights - do the saga of this and that. Many a time, drinking and smoking for men, and rumour mongering (complaining) and checking handphones for ladies.

The common ground would be the smokers, as they will form a group outside while many are inside sheltered. Irrespective of men or women, the rights or wrongs of smoking, either side has their own definition of such act. Really, nobody really cares.

Amidst, in safeguarding one's position and avoiding conflict, you will see three behaviours.

1. The politicians - the great many who would head their groupings.
2. The followers - these are people who would stick to the chosen group or politicians.
3. The deviants - these are those who choose to be loners. This of course, is the smaller segment of the three.

I being a loner, is definitely by choice because I understand the selfishness in me that I am never a group player. This, I admit is a mistake in the making for job promotion or any political career I may be lucky in associating.

Historically, I once joined force with the 'social animals' with little achievement and now I realized that such behaviour is not warranted of me in this type of gathering. Although being viewed as 'out caste', I must admit I do not regret, or dismay at the outcome. Observing people from far has become a skill I acquired through time and space.

Time - you need to repeat the experience of a loner observer to be comfortable with it. Only as you become acquainted with loneliness, that you have a clear mind of what you can 'see'.

Space - you need to have distance to observe people, like observing a pack of wolves on how they position their attacks.

And, once in a while you can join the group and 'taste the medicine' that you had already known.

A conversation below provides a good example. In order to make it a narrative, I put myself as 'X'.

X tried to join by asking if the seat has been taken.

Y (although empty seats around) said "I'm sorry, all seats taken." So, X moved away. To some, this is a disappointment, but not to X, this is naturally a common occurrence. He had been a loner too many times.

X moved over a few benches and finally found a seat not taken. X happily sat down, thanking the beautiful girl who granted the seat.

Trying to settle down comfortably, X tried to strike a conversation with A, B and C.

X said "How's the food, I'm seeing people ordering lobsters?"

A said to B and C, "Why not order some lobsters ourselves?" 

B put up hand, "Order Order Order" And, the restaurant staff came to take order. "Three lobsters, please!"

Shortly after, A asked X

"Why are you not ordering your lobster?"

"Well," X said "It is okay, I had lobsters in my place. You all go ahead, I'm okay." And, there is this 'one kind of look' from A, B and C. It seemed 'So, you are not our gang, eh!'.

Another round of taking food from the buffet table, X came back with little food as he did not like to eat full in the evening, he refrained from taking more food to avoid wastage.

"Oh, you don't eat much!" A said, making it a discovery in rocket science!

"Ya, I agree with you. I USUALLY don't eat a lot, after all I'm small in size." X was trying to be nice and sarcastic to retaliate.

"No wonder, for a man, you seem smaller than a girl." That was the reply from A. Getting that, X had to shut up.

Really, it was a sudden awakening within X. With good intention, he did not want to say he had enough of the food and never hard up for such buffet - or lobsters or oysters. In fact, they are never a scarcity in his place. They were to him, larger prawn or mollucks, nothing more nothing great!

So, getting stressed over a comment wasn't worth it. He however, sat quietly for a while. As people moved away, either to the washroom or to replenish their plates, the ordered lobsters came. There were double orders. Probably, in the excitement of the monster prawns and overwhelming demand, there was some delay in serving. Therefore, B under the command of A, ordered twice. However, there was nobody left at the table accept X at time of serving.

So, the restaurant staff asked if it was ordered by the correct table. X said "Yes, but they are not around." For a moment, the restaurant staff was having the impression that X was eating all the lobsters himself!

Little while later, A, B and C came back. They took some of the lobsters, and left a large portion not eaten. What a waste!

Human is a social animal, is true and I witness it again and again. In fact, probably only A wanted to eat lobster, B followed and being a follower, ordered for A. C in fact, never stated her opinion. She might have never wanted, but tagged along just to be in the 'cool' as she was with the group.

So, being a "social animal" is both true by the meaning of "social" and "animal" separately. Aristotle's quote is here proven by ordering of lobsters. What a sad thing in life!

Hence, the second quote:

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom"

How many of us really know ourselves?

How many of us can be truthful to ourselves?

How many of us can be ourselves?

Reflection

If you are still younger than 40 years old. You might be execused from not knowing yourself. But, beyond 40, there is no more execuse. You have passed your mid-life assuming you live an average of 80 years old. You can no more waste your time.

We are like a product. Do not follow others. Be yourself. You should have your product distinctive features. There is a different between being yourself and being a team player.

The law is never lenient on you although you did an unlawful act under an order of your team leader. The law punishes the red handed first, not the team leader (who is the master mind). So, don't be a fool following others. Be yourself.

Contracts Act, 1950 in Section 177 specifies Non-liability of employer of agent to do a criminal act.

Ref:
http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/2192.Aristotle
S.177 Contracts Act, 1950.

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